8 Tips For Visiting Someone With Dementia
It's no secret that humans are social creatures. From living with family and building friendships to working in teams, we spend our lives connecting with others. Someone with dementia is no different.
Visits offer a source of comfort, support, and connection. So making every visit with your loved one, a meaningful one plays a significant role in their (and your!) health and well-being.
However, often the reality is visiting someone with Alzheimer's disease, dementia, or other cognitive impairment can bring about some uncertainty- knowing how to interact, what to say, what not to say, etc.
Utilizing these tips before and during your visits can help create a positive experience for everyone involved.
The Do’s And Don’ts Of Visiting Someone With Dementia
Whether your loved one is living at home with assistance or in a memory care community in the Central Virginia area, there are a few things to remember before you visit.
Plan Ahead
It's important to remember every person with Alzheimer's and dementia is different. Before you go, check with the caregiver(s) in the community to find the best time to visit. If they are early risers, it might be earlier in the morning, or if your loved one sleeps in, a visit after lunch might be ideal. Try to avoid evening or late visits due to sundowning, a state of restlessness, agitation, irritability, or confusion that can worsen as daylight begins to fade.
In addition, it's also helpful to have an activity in mind before your visit. These activities don't have to be complicated- bringing a photo album to go through or listening to a few of their favorite songs are great ways to spend time together.
Extra helpful tip: You may want to check the activities calendar in their community for activities that interest them and that you could also participate in.
Aim For Regular, Short Visits
If you live far away, this might be hard to do, but regular short visits are better than infrequent, longer visits. Your loved one may get tired, overwhelmed, or anxious with more extended visits.
You should also try to end your visit when another activity starts, like lunch or social activity.
Meet Them Where They Are; Never Correct Or Argue
With many cognitive diseases, there can be moments of clarity and moments where confusion sets in. One minute they may remember, and the next, they may believe they are in a time of the past.
This is their reality- don't argue, point out mistakes, or respond with, "don't you remember?". These negative reactions can cause your loved one to shut down and feel embarrassed or angry. Instead, go with the flow of the conversation.
Communicate Clearly
Depending on what stage of the disease your loved one is in, they may or may not remember you or other family or friends. Learning how to adjust your communication with the progression of the disease will ultimately make visits much more meaningful.
Be sure to introduce yourself and others during the visit. For example, "I had lunch with Carol, my daughter, yesterday" or "Hi Dad, I'm Rich, your son."
Connect With Eye Contact Or Touch (With Their Permission)
Someone in the later stages of Alzheimer's and dementia may not be able to communicate verbally, but there are several ways to connect with them during your visits.
Eye contact, gentle touch, or even a hand massage can be comforting and reassuring. Remember, not all communication is verbal.
Validate Their Feelings
Letting your loved one feel heard is essential to their emotional well-being. Angry, sad, excited-let them express their feelings. Never talk over them or talk about them to others like they aren't there.
Educate Yourself About Their Disease
Understanding Alzheimer's disease or dementia can give you better insight into what your loved one is going through. Educating yourself about their disease can help you know the challenges and prepare for adjustments in your visits.
Your local Alzheimer's Association office, like the Greater Richmond Alzheimer's Association, is an excellent resource for finding information about each disease. The community your loved one is in or the home care company providing caregiver services can also assist in providing you with resources.
Remember Self-Care
As important as visits are to someone living with dementia, it's equally important to take care of yourself. Not all visits will be easy; some will be more challenging than others.
Take time after each visit to recognize your feelings and what you need as well- that may include talking to a professional, starting a journal, meditating, etc. Primary caregiver or not, self-care is a critical component.
Final Thoughts And How Benchmark Senior Solutions Can Help
Visiting someone with Alzheimer's or dementia provides emotional support, connection, and comfort. Preparing in advance and knowing as much as possible about the disease can help make these visits meaningful and fulfilling.
If you need information about senior living communities in the Richmond area or want to explore housing options to meet the needs of your loved one better, Benchmark Senior Solutions can help.
We use our knowledge and expertise to help your loved one find the perfect place to call home based on their medical needs, budget, and lifestyle. From assisted living and memory care to skilled nursing and independent communities, Benchmark is Richmond's trusted source for senior placement services. Contact us today to get started!
